What’s the most serious crime you’ve committed?

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Postby !azzip » Sun Feb 11, 2018 2:38 am

In the eyes of the law
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Postby IThinkItsIndecision » Sun Feb 11, 2018 3:01 am

I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

It was man2, but I wasn't convicted.
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Postby Roofies Pizza » Sun Feb 11, 2018 3:14 am

Been charged with? Got away with?

Currently, a DUI. I'm on probation.

Didnt get charged: almost shot a dude in the head with a pellet gun. Technically it was attempted murder, because I was trying to kill him. But he didnt know that, I just blew his back window out inches from his head. I was about 12. Glad it panned out ok and only got grounded for a year.
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Postby dyna-soar » Sun Feb 11, 2018 3:22 am

i accidentally stole a tomato once.
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Postby brah_life » Sun Feb 11, 2018 4:44 am

Fishing without a license, second offense.
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Postby othernewest1 » Sun Feb 11, 2018 4:54 am

Nice try cop
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Postby futureworldcitizen » Sun Feb 11, 2018 4:58 am

Got a D.U.I. like 9 years ago. Sucked ass cause I was almost home. Like, around the corner.
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Postby futureworldcitizen » Sun Feb 11, 2018 4:59 am

Also got caught stealing a red bull at raley's. They told me I was banned for life lol.
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Postby New Fury » Sun Feb 11, 2018 7:23 am

Being born this beautiful.
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Postby guttertech » Sun Feb 11, 2018 7:23 am

I got a cease and desist email for downloading Predators when it was in theaters.

I'm a fucking maniac.
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Postby SOULJA BOY TELL'EM. » Sun Feb 11, 2018 8:12 am

I stole and I robbed and I kidnapped the President's son and held him for ransom. And I never got caught, neither.
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Postby Scumontherun » Sun Feb 11, 2018 8:53 am

@ New Fury has the right idea.

Told some shit, only caught one. Would skate around and cops would kick us out of the area for being a hassle to local business'. Never charged with anything. I'm a good boy
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Postby jaredfromsubway » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:00 am

as far as actually getting caught......weed possession, years ago
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Postby andydansby » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:19 am

I posted in a bot thread once and the mods never caught me
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Postby antipasto » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:26 am

Broke into a barn wth some friends when we were 13, found a bunch of explosive stuff in there and put it into a glass bottle and blew it up. The cops came like an hour later and told us that if there were any wildfires we'd be first on the list but that's about it
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Postby B-Roll » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:33 am

Counterfeiting money and credit card fraud.
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Postby macho insecurity » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:34 am

I stole a loaf of bread, served some time, got parole, didn't check in with my parole officer, and now I'm a fugitive.

"one day more" as they say!
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Postby EmmanuelXXX » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:47 am

jaredfromsubway wrote:as far as actually getting caught......weed possession, years ago

Screenname doesn’t check out
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Postby HOTDOGS_COMINURWAY » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:59 am

nice try, cop
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Postby oldorder » Sun Feb 11, 2018 10:07 am

Bringing a schedule 1 drug on an interstate flight years ago, definitely up there with the dumbest things I've ever done.
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Postby !azzip » Sun Feb 11, 2018 10:44 am

Didn’t mention being arrested or convicted. Confess
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Postby Adonis » Sun Feb 11, 2018 10:49 am

Incest.

Im not going to go into too much detail, but it involved a bag of rice and your father.
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Postby HOTDOGS_COMINURWAY » Sun Feb 11, 2018 12:06 pm

snek counterfeiting
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Postby taylorm » Sun Feb 11, 2018 12:11 pm

I threw a huge party 13 years ago, neighbors were tired of our shit, called the cops and I had to go to court for disturbing the peace. Got 18 months of informal probation, which didn’t even mean anything. Still not 100% sure what that even means, because I never had to do anything. To this day it’s the only thing I’ve ever been ticketed for.

Besides that? I threw a party that resulted in a house burning down, defaced property, stolen music and movies and typical stuff like that.
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Postby scrubber » Sun Feb 11, 2018 12:14 pm

Fucking everyones dad
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Postby ihatethehumanrace » Sun Feb 11, 2018 1:01 pm

when did self snitching become cool
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Postby jaredfromsubway » Sun Feb 11, 2018 1:30 pm

Then not getting caught....breaking and entering
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Postby ass eyes » Sun Feb 11, 2018 1:47 pm

B-Roll wrote:Counterfeiting money and credit card fraud.


Image
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Postby brah_life » Sun Feb 11, 2018 3:48 pm

Jerked using my left hand, I'm usually a righty.
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Postby snoro » Sun Feb 11, 2018 5:15 pm

i took a shit in a plastic bag and threw it in the neighbors apple tree.
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Postby xbudlightx » Sun Feb 11, 2018 5:27 pm

i went through a 6 month period in 9th grade where I'd hang out in the magazine section at Walgreen's and pour a bag of chewy runts into my pocket
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Postby oldorder » Sun Feb 11, 2018 5:45 pm

feminine weirdo and nerd wrote:Jerked using my left hand, I'm usually a righty.

Yeah, but you were fingering your sister with your right in your defense.
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Postby Sarahohio » Sun Feb 11, 2018 6:08 pm

xbudlightx wrote:i went through a 6 month period in 9th grade where I'd hang out in the magazine section at Walgreen's and pour a bag of chewy runts into my pocket

I feel like you should've said you did this in 5th grade or something lol
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Postby othernewest1 » Sun Feb 11, 2018 6:35 pm

oldorder wrote:
feminine weirdo and nerd wrote:Jerked using my left hand, I'm usually a righty.

Yeah, but you were fingering your sister with your right in your defense.

why i oughta
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Postby macho insecurity » Sun Feb 11, 2018 6:35 pm

oldorder wrote:
feminine weirdo and nerd wrote:Jerked using my left hand, I'm usually a righty.

Yeah, but you were fingering your sister with your right in your defense.

dude, cold. his sister died several years ago from mesothlioma.
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Postby !azzip » Sun Feb 11, 2018 6:38 pm

I used to steal. A lot
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Postby xbudlightx » Sun Feb 11, 2018 6:53 pm

Sarahohio wrote:
xbudlightx wrote:i went through a 6 month period in 9th grade where I'd hang out in the magazine section at Walgreen's and pour a bag of chewy runts into my pocket

I feel like you should've said you did this in 5th grade or something lol


:smt005 :smt005 :smt005
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Postby donnie_d3 » Sun Feb 11, 2018 7:08 pm

Shit in a pool
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Postby judge smails » Sun Feb 11, 2018 7:32 pm

ihatethehumanrace wrote:when did self snitching become cool

These are crimes we already got caught for. My crime was dui. I was already convicted so it’s all a matter of public record, so as far as I’m concerned there’s nothing to snitch on.
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Postby brah_life » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:06 pm

oldorder wrote:
feminine weirdo and nerd wrote:Jerked using my left hand, I'm usually a righty.

Yeah, but you were fingering your sister with your right in your defense.

A swing and a miss- not even remotely funny, you whiny little loser @ life bitch. :smt001
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Postby ihatethehumanrace » Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:43 pm

judge smails wrote:
ihatethehumanrace wrote:when did self snitching become cool

These are crimes we already got caught for. My crime was dui. I was already convicted so it’s all a matter of public record, so as far as I’m concerned there’s nothing to snitch on.


gotcha.

in that case, i got busted by an FBI agent with h on me.
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Postby SomeTribe » Sun Feb 11, 2018 10:25 pm

Never got caught for anything, I used to steal money from the register of a UPS store I worked at. I also would take packages, go through people's mail and one time used my keys to get in after hours so my band could record a demo. I was pretty fucking dumb at 18.
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Postby brah_life » Sun Feb 11, 2018 10:27 pm

Returned books to library two days past their due date.

#thug-life
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Postby Brave Captain » Mon Feb 12, 2018 1:59 pm

getting caught: was getting a blowjob in some chicks car when the cops pulled up when i was like 19, she was 30

not getting caught: blowing up mailboxes
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Postby ooGracie » Mon Feb 12, 2018 3:48 pm

I got caught stealing DragonBallZ toys from KMart when I was in 9th grade.

Cops descended upon my car with weapons drawn when I was 16 because my passenger was hanging out of the window with a cap gun, yelling "YOU BETTER CHECK YO SELF!" and shooting the cap gun.

I went to jail for 2 days for "theft of services" in 2010 (because I got into a cab and could not find my wallet when I arrived at the airport --- my wallet was in my suitcase the whole time -- it's a long-ass story).

Never got caught, but when I was 16/17 my girlfriends and I were huge idiots and use to "guacamole bomb" cars on the freeway. We would fill up the plastic toy containers from the $0.25 machine with burrito toppings and then throw them at the side of semis. IDK why.... but looking back on it, that was very stupid and we couldn't have for sure caused an accident.

Also on time I threw a dummy off of a freeway overpass, and it caused a massive pileup. That same summer, I threw my sister through some thin ice when we were ice skating and she nearly drown, and then later I tried to smother her. My mom got pretty pissed at all of my outbursts that summer, and continually tried to reason with me even though she suspected I drown my little brother in a bathtub (I did).
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Postby creativexcover » Mon Feb 12, 2018 3:55 pm

Got caught smoking weed with friends maybe 4 years ago after one of them called AAA before we sparked up and the AAA dude ratted on us. Stupid decision. The kid that called AAA was the holder of the weed and when the cops came he tossed the bag in my lap. I guess I knew who was my friend at that point haha.
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Postby Lcuster » Mon Feb 12, 2018 3:56 pm

got busted for underage drinking 16 years ago. Came across my livejournal a few years ago where I wrote about the ordeal. Got some major douche-chills after reading it.
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Postby Lil Meatsauce » Mon Feb 12, 2018 4:27 pm

ooGracie wrote:I got caught stealing DragonBallZ toys from KMart when I was in 9th grade.

Cops descended upon my car with weapons drawn when I was 16 because my passenger was hanging out of the window with a cap gun, yelling "YOU BETTER CHECK YO SELF!" and shooting the cap gun.

I went to jail for 2 days for "theft of services" in 2010 (because I got into a cab and could not find my wallet when I arrived at the airport --- my wallet was in my suitcase the whole time -- it's a long-ass story).

Never got caught, but when I was 16/17 my girlfriends and I were huge idiots and use to "guacamole bomb" cars on the freeway. We would fill up the plastic toy containers from the $0.25 machine with burrito toppings and then throw them at the side of semis. IDK why.... but looking back on it, that was very stupid and we couldn't have for sure caused an accident.

Also on time I threw a dummy off of a freeway overpass, and it caused a massive pileup. That same summer, I threw my sister through some thin ice when we were ice skating and she nearly drown, and then later I tried to smother her. My mom got pretty pissed at all of my outbursts that summer, and continually tried to reason with me even though she suspected I drown my little brother in a bathtub (I did).


WHAT THE FUCK??!!!
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Postby ass eyes » Mon Feb 12, 2018 5:24 pm

Lil Meatsauce wrote:
ooGracie wrote:I got caught stealing DragonBallZ toys from KMart when I was in 9th grade.

Cops descended upon my car with weapons drawn when I was 16 because my passenger was hanging out of the window with a cap gun, yelling "YOU BETTER CHECK YO SELF!" and shooting the cap gun.

I went to jail for 2 days for "theft of services" in 2010 (because I got into a cab and could not find my wallet when I arrived at the airport --- my wallet was in my suitcase the whole time -- it's a long-ass story).

Never got caught, but when I was 16/17 my girlfriends and I were huge idiots and use to "guacamole bomb" cars on the freeway. We would fill up the plastic toy containers from the $0.25 machine with burrito toppings and then throw them at the side of semis. IDK why.... but looking back on it, that was very stupid and we couldn't have for sure caused an accident.

Also on time I threw a dummy off of a freeway overpass, and it caused a massive pileup. That same summer, I threw my sister through some thin ice when we were ice skating and she nearly drown, and then later I tried to smother her. My mom got pretty pissed at all of my outbursts that summer, and continually tried to reason with me even though she suspected I drown my little brother in a bathtub (I did).


WHAT THE FUCK??!!!


Yeah, what?
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Postby Lil Meatsauce » Mon Feb 12, 2018 5:35 pm

ass eyes wrote:
Lil Meatsauce wrote:
ooGracie wrote:I got caught stealing DragonBallZ toys from KMart when I was in 9th grade.

Cops descended upon my car with weapons drawn when I was 16 because my passenger was hanging out of the window with a cap gun, yelling "YOU BETTER CHECK YO SELF!" and shooting the cap gun.

I went to jail for 2 days for "theft of services" in 2010 (because I got into a cab and could not find my wallet when I arrived at the airport --- my wallet was in my suitcase the whole time -- it's a long-ass story).

Never got caught, but when I was 16/17 my girlfriends and I were huge idiots and use to "guacamole bomb" cars on the freeway. We would fill up the plastic toy containers from the $0.25 machine with burrito toppings and then throw them at the side of semis. IDK why.... but looking back on it, that was very stupid and we couldn't have for sure caused an accident.

Also on time I threw a dummy off of a freeway overpass, and it caused a massive pileup. That same summer, I threw my sister through some thin ice when we were ice skating and she nearly drown, and then later I tried to smother her. My mom got pretty pissed at all of my outbursts that summer, and continually tried to reason with me even though she suspected I drown my little brother in a bathtub (I did).


WHAT THE FUCK??!!!


Yeah, what?


for me its the first 3 revelations that have me stunned!
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